THE RITE OF RESERVATION
In almost all highbrow and middlebrow eating establishments of any repute, a reservation is absolutely essential (especially on weekends). It should be booked (depending upon a given restaurant's popularity) well in advance and, should some unforeseen event rear its ugly head, also properly canceled. Anyone, sporting a triple-knit jacket and sheepish grin, who dares to show his face on a bustling Saturday evening without benefit of previous arrangement should be immediately exiled to a bowling alley.
One additional point... If your reservation is for eight o'clock, you should arrive AT eight o'clock (preferably a few minutes before), not come sauntering in whenever you damn well please. As a matter of courtesy, most restaurants will hold a reservation for fifteen or twenty minutes beyond the appointed hour... but don't press your luck. On a busy night, anything can happen. You might even find yourself out in the snow in search of a White Castle.
If it appears that you will be unavoidably delayed, by all means, have the good sense to notify the establishment in question. State, as concisely as possible, the inauspicious circumstances of your upcoming tardiness and the estimated time of your arrival. Brought off with a certain degree of panache, this is one move that will invariably raise your culinary stature by several notches.
When phoning to make said reservation, the conversation should be short, sweet, simple. State the day, date, and time you desire, your last name ONLY, and the number of persons in your party. A local yokel who books reservations in the name of "Doctor" (medical or otherwise), "Senator" (except in a certain town along the Potomac, "Father," or "The Reverend Mr. So-and-So" is indulging in the ultimate loser's ploy and cannot possibly be taken seriously at table. This goes double for the wishy-washy wimp who books a reservation in his/her own name and then proceeds to relate: "Oh... and So-and-So (undoubtedly some infamous personage) will be dining in our party."
When booking a reservation, if at all possible, always ask for a SPECIFIC table. Requesting so raises a red flag. It tells the proprietor/maitre d' two things: 1) You have certainly dined at the restaurant before and (2) You know exactly what you want (and are probably accustomed to getting it). If this will be your initial foray into unexplored territory -- but you have managed to do a little reconnaissance beforehand -- you might still be able to pull off a coup by requesting "the table beneath the Renoir," or noting some other appropriate landmark. If you have never darkened the door of said eatery, you may simply have to resort to requesting a "quiet table." Obviously this is not the most effective stratagem, but it may still mark you as a semi-competent diner (or at least an incurable romantic).
Phoning for a reservation, it should be noted, also affords you ample opportunity to clear up a number of other questions that may be of vital importance. Most of us, for example, would prefer to dine in a smoke-free environment. The appropriate moment to assure that this preference will be honored is at the time of reservation. Should a given establishment not have a separate nonsmoking section, you may either take your chances or dine elsewhere. To blame the restaurant for your lack of foresight, however, is the height of poor taste.
Another bit of business that may (and should) be settled with an initial phone call is the matter of appropriate dress. A splashy entrance, fetchingly garbed in Dockers or designer jeans (when all about you are attired in jackets and ties), may not only cause looks of contempt to be thrown your way, it may also leave you out in the cold. Highfalutin' establishments can be mighty persnickety when it comes to dress codes. As you move down in the culinary pecking order, there is a general loosening up in this regard. If you've had opportunity to case the joint ahead of time, you should have a pretty fair sense of what the traffic will bear. In this, and in all other relevant restaurant matters, however, a simple rule of thumb (and of common sense) applies: When in doubt, ASK.
Bon Appétit!
